Tragic Tranny

12.15.2005
Ore : 8:14 AM

In the soothing embrace of a tray of cocktails, the have Golden Girls decided to help me out with our latest round of Tragic Tranny blogging...



DOROTHY: Unlike most children, I was never afraid of what was in the closet or under the bed at night. That whole phase didn't start until my first visit to lower Eddy St. in San Francisco.

SOPHIA: Picture it: Chowchilla women's facility, 1986. Much like the fabled Achilles, but with a severe skin disorder, Tony "The Rat" Marcotti disguises himself as...

DOROTHY: Oh, ma!!! Enough with the stories.

ROSE: Millions of women suffer from unsightly hairloss. Isn't it time you discovered Rogaine for Women?

BLANCHE: I find it disturbing that chola-lipsticked, ham-necked she-males get more action than I do.

SOPHIA: If someone ever has the bright idea of casting Edward James Olmos as 007, this would be his villain...Or at least, his Bond girl.

TEH L4M3: Dorothy, if anyone ever again makes fun of your man hands in front of me, I'll show them this picture.

SOPHIA: Just make sure they take their Dramamine first.

BLANCHE: In real life, the mistresses are always uglier than the women. Look at Bill Clinton's trailer trash backdoor girls. This one looks to be about Jim Bakker's speed.

ROSE: I see she's fallen for that old folk wisdom hooey. Back in St. Olaf, Danica Lunderberg used to tell everyone that the best way to a fine complexion was to rub fried chicken wings on your face. Clearly this girl's been listening to the same baloney.

BLANCHE: Rose, honey, remind me to throw away the lunch meat in the fridge once we're done here.

DOROTHY: Blanche, the salami already ran away of its own accord after your last trip to the crisper.

TEH L4M3: OKAY, LADIES!!! Thanks for stopping by...

posted by teh l4m3 at 8:14 AM | Permalink |

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Comments for Tragic Tranny
You have such fantastic cameos! Even though in print, I still had the urge to slap Rose.

The Golden Girls were sex in the city before Carrie even knew what a poodle perm was.

EUGH!!
mine eyes!

Robot eyes should be immune to the horror of greasy trannies, non?

I had never made the Blanche-Samantha connection before.

I finally understand that show now. I never realized it was about trannies before...

awesome post. you have truly married something with something else to make a masterpiece of tragic trannyness.

Loved "The Golden Girls."

Hated "Maude."

I know there is a moral to the story, I'm just too busy ROFLMAO to find it!

Ha Ha Teh, very funny post!!!


Maude wasn't that bad! It was part of that whole slew of 70s sitcoms (e.g, All in the Family and Good Times)that had edge and a little tinge of darkness.

Is it wrong that I am not at all frightened by a "greasy tranny," but I am terrified that the Golden Girls can appear like that? I mean, is that just a freak, one-time deal, or can that happen to anyone, anytime?

Please say it is the former...

It is the former...Or is it?

I thought that was a photoshopped thinning of Divine at first.

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