I Take Back Everything Bad I've Said

Ore : 7:37 AM

At least, about Jessica Simpson. If I've said anything. Frankly I don't recall saying that much about her at all.

I'm not of course going to extoll her praises til the cows come home, either. It's not like she dashed into a house collapsed by an earthquake to rescue a basket full of kittens, or formulated a workable Unified Field Theory.

She did, from the perspective of a modern Republican, something much, much more heinous:
she refused to be a fundraising and public-relations tool for the party of Mammon, Satan, and Jesse Helms:

"It just feels wrong," one Simpson insider told Reuters on Wednesday, adding that the actress keeps her political views private. "She would love to meet the president and talk about Operation Smile ... but she can't do it at a fund-raiser for the Republican Party."

One wishes certain columnists *armstrongwilliamscough-cough* and the commanders of U.S. servicemen used as campaign props had been as circumspect.

You know what? Even though I've mostly held my tongue (out of disinterest as much as anything), I have until now counted myself firmly in the Let's Mock The Bimbo Who Works Her Ass More Often Than Her Single Rickety Ganglion Camp.

Yeah, her music is basically a 1:20 scale injection-molded plastic replica of the dreck Ann Margret used to put out. But I find I'm definitely developing a modicum of respect for the woman herself. And if that puts me on the wrong side of the smarmy and vaguely threatening (in this article) Carl Forti, and der gefälschte Cowboy hisself, so much the better.

P.S. If anyone happens to check out Chaz Johnson's teeming meth lab or Freepi Bedlam to see what they're saying about her, report back here in the comments, and we can all marvel anew at her death-defying courage. I don't have the stomach for it myself. Besides, it's going to be a long day.

UPDATE: Naturally, Republican perfidy knows no bounds ("...she's a celebrity that was going to come," whines Tom Reynolds). I love how the response of the Simpson camp, albeit headed by pimp/dad Joe S., is all, "but we do love you, dahlings -- muah, muah [air kiss, air kiss]."

posted by teh l4m3 at 7:37 AM | Permalink |

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Comments for I Take Back Everything Bad I've Said
Whay you gotta hate? Just because the poor girl isn't as smart as everyone else...I mean ANYone else...

I, too, by default have been in the mocking camp. I'll certainly rethink my position. She did take a respectable position!

Jessica Simpson sings?

As a public service, I hereby present the requested material.

(from a freeper thread or two)
Single digit grade school humor here - D-Chivas: She's so dumb she probably thinks President Bush is the thing she just shaved off.

This guy apperently forgot who the five minutes of hate was about today -FormerLib: I just hope that I can get within spitting distance of the Clintons at some point in my life.

I swear to god this is verbatim - cubreporter:I'm sure the Prez sits up at night and and worries about jessica simpson and the chicks. HA,HA,HA.OHO,HO, HEEE, HA, HAH.

This one made me laugh -Extremely Extreme Extremist: Funny how the same FReepers who think Simpson is not good-looking have no problem salivating at the skin-and-bones figure of Ann Coulter.

*Shudder* - tflabo:Who cares.....movie stars are over rated BIGTIME....full of their own self-importance and adulation. She is a babe but so what.....Laura Ingraham is a babe too.

Hilariously disdainful use of the word intelligent, check. -Vision: And I'm not smarmy. I'm very matter of fact. You're kind of smarmy with all your "intelligent" talk.

A post that challenges one's ability to seperate seriousness from satire, check. - It's high time the ACLU & people for the American Way demanded
A separation of entertainment & state...

Freeper domenstrating average level of knowledge vis a vis the subject matter, check. -Ruy Dias de Bivar: I thought she was just another character on the SIMPSONS, a show I never watch.

Petty infighting, check: Regicide: No, you are not the only straight male on the planet who doesn't find Jessica Simpson remotely attractive.
Because you are not straight.

And finally, no freeper thread is complete without an arbitrary attack on hollyGAY rotflmaololz!!!111! - Why should Republicans be miffed at this snub? She is an ENTERTAINER. I guess the Rs want to be in Hollywood's favor just like the Democrats. Too bad.

Interestingly enough, Chaz and his dittoheads haven't started the attack yet. Maybe they really enjoyed the newleyweds?

During Vietnam, the LBJ White House was snubbed by leading literary figures like Arthur Miller and Robert Lowell.

Looks like once again, a wartime White House is getting snubbed by its intellectual equals.

Elmo: check out my imaginary boyfriend, Adam Green: "Jessica Simpson, where has the love gone..."

Timmah: See? This is why I can't go over there -- my brain would turn into buttered oatmeal. But thanks for the reconnaissance mission to the Interweb's fascist hinterlands. You may stand down.

I mean -- Laura Ingraham a babe? WTF? please don't go there any more. I've changed my mind. I can't stand to see you suffer so.

otto man: or rather, superiors. Yikes.

I know, I always feel so dirty after visiting one of those sites, literally makes me want a shower.

It's like I know I should try to set these maroons straight, but I also know that for most it's a lost cause...

Otto man: perfect. Absolutely perfect.


How intense is this story down there? Are we talking Dixie Chicks territory, or what?

I heard she did it because she wanted to sleep with teh and knew he wouldn't touch the other white meat without some serious political T and A in the game.

Jessica Simpson still blows.

madamerouge: hardly. Although it could be -- maybe huge masses of fat white people burning Jessica Simpson CDs is in the cards...

smarty: perhaps. But the salient point is that she doesn't blow Republicans... At least, not for money.

Fat white people are cool.

yeah, I too was in the "mocking" camp...the fact that she even had the social/political awareness to realize that they would be just using her as an icon for their own soapbox, astounds me. That alone deserves my newfound respect (or at least a lack of disrespect)

What, no wise acre comment to mine teh, teh? Love button, are you mad at your little sweet AG?

Boy howdy [pointedly ignoring AG], chuckles, them ambulatory penis-holsters sure do talk a lot, don't they?

Ha ha. Just kidding, sweetheart. Happy St. Patty's day.

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