How It Goes -- How It ALWAYS Goes...

4.17.2006
Ore : 10:55 AM

Half of the American people: "How could Bush nominate this incompetent asshole? He/she'll turn everything he/she touches to shit! The Senate shouldn't confirm him."

Congressional Democrats: "Well, we'll let it go this time. We'll save up for when the President nominates a clearly unacceptable Supreme Court Justice. Supreme Court nominations: That's where we're Vikings!"

[Cut to several years of nasty outbursts and incomprehensibly idiotic decisions by said appointee, and tens of thousands of dead bodies later.]

President Bush and Appointee, flanked by first responders/military personnel lookin' purty for the camera: "Yer doin' a heckuva job, Appointee X."

Most of the American people: "WHAT THE FUCK?"

Congressional Democrats: "Yeah, but you can still get an abortion! Huh? Huh?"

Scalia and Alito: "Vaffanculo, bitches!"; Roberts: "Oh, my!"; Mrs. Alito: "*Sob, sob* *sniffle*"

Anonymous officials close to the White House in the WaPo/NYT/Newsweek: "Expect a shake up soon."

Scott McClellan/Ari Fleischer: "This talk of a shake up is wild speculation. These are just rumors. Just because almost everyone is complaining doesn't mean anything."

President: "I don't pay attention to polls. I do what my heart and Jesus tell me to do."

Almost every American citizen and fed-up underling of Appointee X: "Enough already!"

A vast majority of the Wingnut Wurlitzer: "It's not his/her fault; it's the fault of everyone around him/her" ...Until they can no longer pull it off, at which point it becomes: "Appointee X needs to go lest he endanger the party in the next election. We've been saying it all along."

Dick Cheney on Press the Meat: "*Snarl* Were it not for Appointee X, al Qaeda would've shot your child in the face! *grrr*"

President: "Yer doin' a heckuva job, Appointee X."

[Cut to 12 hours later]

Scott McClellan/Ari Fleischer: "Appointee X, after long deliberation and years of sterling service to the American people, has chosen to resign so he might spend more time with his family. Good luck, you'll be missed."

posted by teh l4m3 at 10:55 AM | Permalink |

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Comments for How It Goes -- How It ALWAYS Goes...
Yes but Easter chocolates are all on sale for half price.

That should count for something.

George Bush does not care about Easter candy. He's too busy hiding behind families and Bibles.

jimmy: yeah I'm still eatin my peeps and the cadbury eggs they laid.

nölff: George Bush don't care 'bout nothin'. Well, he cares about gay families doing the easter egg hunt. THere's that.

cadbury mini eggs.

He's not hiding behind families. He's too busy doing blow in the basement before Laura tries to run him over with the car or Jenna tries to steal his stash.
  • Posted at 6:12 PM | By Anonymous Anonymous

Everything in America is ass backwards....like the fact that you elect judges and appoint Presidents for one.

-or that you pretend that you're free of ruling royals, when in fact you aren't. Republic Schmepublic.

-and all of your goddamned money is the same goddamned colour

I think it's clear that Appointee X was only hired as part of an outreach program to the Nation of Islam.

tbl: clearly you understand little about the American form of government.

madame: ahem. you've misspelled "color." crazy canuck.

Our money colors are changing BTW. The new $10 bill is sort of a peach shade.

Indy - Woot! Progress! Today: peach-coloured 10-spots. Tomorrow: the metric system.

teh: I'm confused. Doesn't the electoral college basically "appoint" the president after the election? And they aren't necessarily bound to follow their voting constituencies ("faithless electors" and such)?

Elections are boring and hard. What channel are the "Full House" reruns on?

madamerouge -
That's right. That was a key aspect of Bush vs. Gore in 2000. We - the private citizens - have no Constitutional right to vote for President.

Oh! but we are the freest, most democratic country in the world, because we are told that we are.

POWER to the peeps!

You nailed it, teh. Nice post.

Peeps are WMD's, by the way. Stop eating them.

Terrorists hate Easter and Freedom. What we need are more heroes.

I haven't seen any peach money yet.

Teh, as usual, you have summed things up nicely.

More importantly, you made me laugh while you summed.

I haven't seen any peach money yet.

I saw it once in the arms of a stripper. She had serious peach money.
  • Posted at 6:46 AM | By Anonymous Anonymous

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