Freedom Camp

Down On The Corner...

7.28.2007
Ore : 3:02 PM

Shorter Byron York: "You know what a small wallet means, right? Small penis."

Shorter Lisa Schiffren: "Boobies are icky, and I can't wait to see Mitt Romney in a flightsuit."

Shorter Mark Krikorian: "Russians. Vodka. Ha! Take that, Goldberg!"

Shorter Mark Steyn: "Ooh, snap, the page containing 'hypocrisy' is missing from my dictionary. Here's what I think it means..."

Shorter Kathryn Lopez: "Nefarious liberals are in it only to keep out future Clarence Thomases."

Shorter David Freddoso: "I'm shocked that some unknown congressional representative would not renew his commitment to an ill-considered wingnut pledge in light of a changing electoral landscape."

Shorter Kathryn Lopez: "Ssssslurrrrp."

Shorter David Freddoso: "This anonymous e-mailer agrees with me: if your local schoolboard concludes that ketchup is a vegetable, there shouldn't be a goddamn thing the FDA can say about it."

Shorter Yuval Levin: "Hillary wants to sterilize black people. Vote Republican!"

Labels: America's Shittiest Website, evil, Frankensteyn's Momster, Republican't stooges, stupidity, wingnuttery

posted by teh l4m3 at 3:02 PM

| Permalink | 5 be jibber-jabberin'

Of Lucky Duckies and Republicans

3.07.2007
Ore : 1:14 PM

“...[O]ne of the key measures of a society’s health is how easily you can insulate yourself from its underclass.” - Mark Steyn.

Katrina, no FEMA trailers for tornado victims, Walter Reed, the decades-long jihad against public education, opposition to minimum wage and healthcare reform: These are all symptoms of rampant Republicanism. I'm going eschew handy neologisms like conservatarian, propertarian, movement conservatives, libertarians and what have you -- they have their place in any dialogue, but let's call a spade a spade. Let Instaglenn hedge on his favored pigeonhole all he wants; the problem has become the party through which all of these weirdos like him achieve their political parity.

Don't think I come at this with unrealistic expectations: should we retain a Democratic majority in the Congress after, say, Senator Clinton takes the Oval Office, we won't see an end to metastasized militarism, free healthcare for everyone, and all the rainbow-colored ponies we can ride. I'm not so optimistic that I see a national election as anything other than an attempt to find the least among several evils. (I just keep perspective: politicians are manipulative and often self-serving? Ooh, that's ground-breaking; but how then should we characterize royalty? Plutocrats? Military dictators? Oh, and yes, if you're a 30-percenter, don't bother answering that.)

Republicans since the fall of Nixon have not only failed to apprehend representative democracy, they don't even comprehend the nature and purpose of government itself -- they are incapable of governance of any stripe.

The rub I'm getting to is this: let's for starters keep in mind that, thanks to regressive taxes and a barbaric, unjust income tax scheme, a hugely disproportionate amount of tax-revenue comes from the American poor and middle class, and Doctor Pat "BB guns and adult diapers" Santy's fear of the Left's Borg-like collectivism notwithstanding, they ought to see something in return. Considering the billions we all of us pour in every year, there's no reason to raid Social Security. There's no real reason Deamonte Driver should be dead, except for the perennial, sociopathic machinations of the kind of people who write for and read the National Review (WARNING: Safe for work, but exceedingly vile).

There's plenty of money, but it's all going to kickbacks and graft among our elected leaders and the military industrial complex. There's money for you if you write sycophantic lies on behalf of the AEI, but not if you do actual investigative journalism. There's money for you if you're a food services contractor who gives U.S. soldiers and Marines the runs, but don't expect to keep your paycheck if you're a USDA inspector who actually tries to do his or her job. There may even be money for your soup kitchen, as long as your clients accept Jesus as their Lord and personal Savior.

You get to pay the Republicans' cronies, but there's nothing for you...

Labels: America's Shittiest Website, common sense, crypto-fascism, evil, Frankensteyn's Momster, Glennocidal Tendencies, jingoism, Norby, stupidity, wingnuttery

posted by teh l4m3 at 1:14 PM

| Permalink | 12 be jibber-jabberin'

Make-up Hint To Pammycakes

2.15.2007
Ore : 11:06 PM

I noticed in this recent picture posted of atlasshrugs's Pam Oshry (yes, find the link for yourselves -- she's one of "those," and you're big boys and girls), the V-Day one in which she's posing with relative sedateness with heterosexual theatre critic Mark Steyn, that she heavily favors the Jessica Simpsonish smoky, smoldering eyes. My advice: chuck it. On Jessica Simpson, it fails to do what I apprehend she wants it to do: make her look deeper than she is. On Pam, it positively makes the old crow's feet look like brand-new buzzard tracks. I say lighten up. Pam should stop ignoring the lips and instead focus on them, and imbue them with incandescence a la Julianne Moore (hated liberal, I know...) Let the eyes speak for themselves.

She would still look crazier than Cheryl Crow trying to score an 8-ball, but the point is liquid eyeliner -- eschew drawing attention to the worn-out orbits, and make the guy focus down to the cheekbones and lips. Bonus? Peeps will be less interested in her severe, yet strangely unwidow's-peaked fivehead.

Labels: celebrity make-up tips, crypto-fascism, fascism, Frankensteyn's Momster, hilariously gay

posted by teh l4m3 at 11:06 PM

| Permalink | 2 be jibber-jabberin'

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Down On The Corner...

Of Lucky Duckies and Republicans

Make-up Hint To Pammycakes

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