Is He Crying For A Change? Depends™...

3.20.2007
Ore : 12:10 PM

So, I just got back from getting the library mail, and two things stuck out.

Assata Shakur ain't got nuthin' on me, bitchez.First, the CAIR package. Alas, it exploded when I opened it -- but with liberalism, not Semtex (though some might argue the two are interchangeable.) CAIR was kind enough to send me that book in which Communist Jimmy Carter proves once and for all that Jews are the new Nazis. I hope I can read it in time for my next Bund rally!

Second, the super-classy cover of this week's issue of TIME, on which
Zombie Reagan cries for the sins of the modern Right. Not that that makes much sense; I mean yes, it makes sense that someone would hijack a conveniently dead figurehead with PhotoShop in order to forward an agenda (and really, this cover definitely could have used a background collage of the collapsing WTC, an equally lachrymose bald eagle, and the burnt and bloody corpse of Dale Ernhardt, Jr., as well), but not that he would be looking down from heaven and crying. Tears? The Gipper don't shed no tears -- I'd sooner expect to see the Duke wipe his fatally constipated ass with Charmin' wetnaps than with the lichen-encrusted scraps of oak bark that Supply Side Jesus intended for real he-men to use.

BRAAAAIIIIIIINNNNNNNSSSS!!!Then again, he could be crying because that pesky Wisenheimer's disease prevents him from viewing Bush's fall into even worse gracelesness in the context of the history of the American Right, which, let's face it, has never had integrity; Reagan provided only an illusion of that.

"What would Ronnie do?" For one thing, he would have kept John Ashcroft, instead of hiring some wetback. Then he'd eat jellybeans and take a nap, while a molar-grinding and angrily muttering George H.W. Bush would head south to the border to supervise the construction of that new
electrified fence.

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posted by teh l4m3 at 12:10 PM | Permalink | 5 be jibber-jabberin'

Several Observations On Plame Hearings...

3.16.2007
Ore : 8:28 AM

- Less self-aggrandizing grandstanding by the congresscritters than I'm used to in other hearings, and I find it refreshing.

- That last election really made the Republicans all kinds of gun-shy. Their line of questioning, though clearly designed to run interference for the White House, nevertheless seems especially subdued. They're sticking to innuendo, but still telegraphing their punches: every question can be reliably translated to mean "Is there any way we can blame you for all of this?"

- Westmoreland? WEST-FUCKING-MORELAND??? Honestly. And why does he sound like Forest Gump?

- The Kooch kinda went off on a tangent, but he is right to call attention to this pattern of persons being targeted and persecuted for not offering absolute loyalty to the Bush Administration and its whims, regardless of said persons' inherent competence and rightness.

- Rep. Diane Watson: Occasionally odd, but goddamn, do not mess with her. The lady does not pull punches.

- Nice on Rep. Lynch to underline the subtle misogyny behind certain Right-wing claims of nepotism -- "...like my wife sends me out to put out the trash."

- I do wish the Democratic congresscritters would keep their asking for speculation to a minimum. Thank goodness Mrs. Wilson maintains boundaries with regards to logic and intellect.

- The "Impeach Bush" chica in the background: right sentiment, and at least she's not screaming, but I think she's detracting from the proceedings. RETARDEAU HTML Mencken, feel free to excoriate me for this.

Okay, I gotta take a shit, shower, shave, and go to work.

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posted by teh l4m3 at 8:28 AM | Permalink | 3 be jibber-jabberin'

Any Excuse They Can Find to Fluff...

3.11.2007
Ore : 7:40 AM

Shorter Newsweek: "Mmmphf... *gag* mmmmglgglg... Gates cock! Mmmmphf... *gag* slurrrrrpSMACK... Okay, *cough, cough*, so, he's like rilly so much better at scrambling a PR response and stuff, and he's like, totally not mean and incompetent and senile, you know, like that icky old Rumsfeld...

"
Iran/Contra? God, you're soooo old!"

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posted by teh l4m3 at 7:40 AM | Permalink | 3 be jibber-jabberin'

Not So Stealthy Wingnuttery

2.16.2007
Ore : 1:08 PM

From the article "Finding Washington's Faith":

[American Profile]: Washington's image today is quaint at best. We mostly see him as a talking dollar bill in a TV commercial for a President's Day sale. How did he become such a largely forgotten hero?

[Peter A. Lillback]: I suppose because of the spirit of political correctness. In seeking to correct the oversight of people that belong in our story as Americans, we've thrown out some of our white male founders. We don't know them anymore...
Wow. I'm going to, for the sake of this post, allow that Lillback knows what he's talking about, and that most Americans are as vapid and ignorant of their own history as American Profile's Alanna Nash.

People don't know much about Washington not because corporate America and its legion of screech monkeys in the Religious Right (both composed almost entirely of some of the wealthiest, most powerful white men the Earth has ever known) have been waging a usually subtle jihad against public education in America for decades, but because America has become hostile to white men.

(
American Profile can be found as a supplement in any local newspaper that's run by wingnuts or is desperate enough for cash. This excerpt was taken from their February 18-24th issue, the cover of which has a Norman Rockwellesque image of General Washington pulling a "praying Calvin" pose -- very classy.)

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posted by teh l4m3 at 1:08 PM | Permalink | 3 be jibber-jabberin'

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